From summer camps to the fashion industry...God's way..
Before I begin this post I just want to thank you guys for sticking with me for so long! I truly appreciate it!
Lately, I’ve been feeling so down on myself, being hard on myself because I wasn’t where I wanted to be - especially in this blogging world. I kept getting frustrated with God and myself. I constantly kept asking Him if He was hearing my prayers. Moods like this would push me away, but lately, I’ve been trying to run to Him more even at my lowest. I decided to read some scriptures that would encourage me and came across this:
“My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. He will not let your foot be moved; He who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, He who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand.” Psalms 121:2-5 ESV
As I finished reading the scripture, it dawned to me that March 2019 will make a year since God blessed me with my first job within the fashion industry - a job that has finally put me a step closer to the career I never thought I could have.
Now, if you’re new to this blog, let me give you some back story. After graduating from undergrad and telling my parents that I was no longer interested in attending law school, I had to basically figure out what I wanted to do. For someone whose family always planned out her life, this was extremely difficult. However, deep down I knew I wanted to get involved in fashion someway somehow, but I didn’t have the background experience required - besides blogging.
While trying to figure this out, I was also working at a non-profit organization as an administrative assistant. (Life is so crazy - as I’m typing this I still can’t believe that I’m actually referring to this position as a part of my past! I really never thought I would leave this place). But anyway, I was an admin doing clerical work. Well, at first it was clerical work, then it led to being involved in meetings I had no interest in. Then I began “helping” with afterschool and camp programs and by “helping” that meant I was now picking up kids from schools and handing out snacks - to the point where one summer I found myself literally boiling hot dogs. At the same time, I was going to job interviews during lunch and after-work. I applied for fashion internships, marketing positions, and the like. I was literally on Linked-in and indeed.com every single day. It was to the point that I even applied just to work on the sales floor at Macy’s - basically anything to get away from the nonprofit sector - and even THAT I didn’t get.
I remember having break downs, crying, praying, and getting rejection email after rejection email - to the point that when I received an email I already knew what the first sentence would say. I had so many people look over my resumes. From people telling me my blog life in my resume was a distraction to others telling me I had nothing to offer. I mean, at this point all I could ask was “God! Where are you?!”.
As I look back, I’m in complete awe. Here I am, one-year later, working at Macy’s Corp under merchandising and buying. Here I am, the girl with the blog that was a distraction on her resume now having the chance to be a part of a style-crew at her job - giving her more of a reason to blog. I look back and then I get upset with myself all over again. Look how far I’ve come. Look how far God has brought me and yet here I am questioning His existence?! Here I am doubting Him?! How?!
Guys. God truly has good plans for your life, but you cannot doubt him. When the enemy comes with thoughts of unworthiness and has you questioning God - remember how far you’ve come. Never in my life would I think my hobby could be incorporated with my job. Never would I have imagined that I would be in buying meetings looking at seasonal collections for Calvin Klein OR having photoshoots during lunch hours for the style-crew.
But God, but God. He is faithful.
Life is funny. It can make you forget about how far you’ve come when things get rocky. But once things start to shake up, don’t lose faith and certainly don’t lose hope. Believe that your Maker will make a way.
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you.” Jeremiah 29:11-12 ESV